In order to re-boot our lives we need to make our current situation as trouble free as possible. Why? Because troubles soak up a lot of energy reducing our ability to focus on building new paths. It’s well worth the effort to look at what makes us happy on a daily basis and what situations are full of frustration, anger, fear or bitterness. When we find something that is a daily negate sink hole we need to defuse or at least calm that situation.
This is a step by step process. We can’t go from troubled to sailing along overnight. If those things that worry and keep us in a bad spot had a quick and easy fix, we’d have fixed them a long time ago. We have to make an improvement plan and have the wisdom to modify the plan as you go along and the determination to stick with it until the plan becomes reality. Consider Maxine’s story:
Maxine was divorced with no children. When her father could no long care for himself due to Lou Gehrig’s disease, Maxine quit her job to care for him fulltime. She’d gave up her apartment in the city and moved into her father’s suburban home. She’d been caring for him for two years and was burned out, lonely and depressed. She determined to make changes so she could re-boot her life.
Her first step was to meet with her two brothers and work out a plan for them to contribute either time or money to the care of their father. With that new plan in place, she freed up fifty percent of her time.
For the first month after her brother’s help kicked in, Maxine took walks, read books, went to movies. When she felt ready, she found a part time job that gave her money to launch her plans for a new life. The new job also gave her some badly needed intellectual stimulation. Next she re-established friendships from her old life.
Her father was still ill, and she still devoted half of her time to his care. But these t steps allowed her to feel that she had a good start on her new life.
Maxine’s first step was to get her brothers’ help. Her second step was to find the part time job. Her third step was to re-start her social life to relieve her feelings of isolation.
We need to find ways to improve our lives, even if the improvements are small. We can’t start feeling better about our life if we’re drowning in our current situation. So it’s important to find ways to feel better for a little while every day. Spending a few minutes daily visualizing a new life is a good start.